Monday, May 23, 2011

2 Less, and an Update

My dear friend Connie met her daughters yesterday in China. Connie and I have never met, but I can tell you she is an amazing woman with a huge heart. She was my "go to" girl when we were thinking of bringing Jaxon home since she had recently bought an older boy home. She has been a tremendous inspiration to me and a shoulder when I have needed it. She and her family are proof that with with God, anything is possible.

They began their process to bring Kasidi Joy home last fall shortly before we began ours to Keliah. In fact, her little Kasidi holds a very special place in my heart. A few months into the process, they heard the Lord telling them they had not one daughter in China but two, and stepped out in complete faith to bring home Kennah Janae.

Like many adoptive families, they began their process with little to no money but in 9 months were fully funded to the tune of $47,000, which is the exact amount they needed to bring both Kasidi and Kennah home. That was all Him, only God could pull something this big off. He led them to their daughters and was there beside them every step of the way, and as a result, Connie is sleeping soundly tonight in China with both Kasidi and Kennah beside her.

Please hop over to her blog to see her two beautiful girls God has blessed her with.

As for us and our situation, we still no nothing, but are hoping and praying we know something this week. We continue to pray, and pray, and pray. I still have that aching knot in the pit of my stomach and I am sure it will be there until we know what is going on. We have provided all the information our agency and immigration has asked for. Honestly, I think they know more about our family than any other adoptive family. The amount of information we have had to provide is ridiculous, but we totally understand why it is needed. We have nothing to hide therefore it has not been an issue to release the information.

We are trying to be as optimistic as we can, but it is really hard not to think of the worst case scenario. I simply cannot imagine what will happen to Keliah if we unable to proceed with her adoption. Our family will be crushed, but I am sure with time, we will heal. The moment I first saw her picture I knew instantly she was our daughter. I tried really hard not to think about her because I just was not sure we could take on her special needs (spina bifida), as a matter of fact, before I ever saw her face, I looked over her because the unknowns of spina bifida terrified me. But, there was no getting her beautiful face out of my mind, so I began researching and after weeks of talking to doctors, hours of googling, and many prayers, Matt and I were certain that just like with Mylee, Drew, and Jaxon, everything was going to be fine.

I know without a doubt she is our daughter. Her picture hangs on the wall right next to the other kids. We talk about her everyday and are asked daily how things are going and we will travel. It is not just us that are excited to bring her home, but our friends and family as well. We have spoken to the school and they too are excited to have her join them and have spoken to us at length about integrating her so she is comfortable. We have been making plans for the girls' room and had just told Emma on Easter that she was going with us to China by putting a pink, rhinestone passport cover in her Easter basket.

My heart breaks for Emma. She is a mess knowing that we may not get Keliah and will start crying out of nowhere with questions like, "why would someone try to keep us from getting Keliah? What will happen to her if she doesn't get a family?" As her mom, it is so hard to answer these questions. She has been asking for years if we could get her a sister her age. She doesn't understand, and to be honest, neither do I.

So, I am once again asking for you to keep our family and Keliah in your prayers. We have dealt with many things through our adoptions, climbed many mountains, ripped through walls brick by brick and to be honest, nothing has compared to what we are going through right now. So, please continue to pray and I will update you as soon as we know something.

Monday, May 9, 2011

Nothing New, But We Have a Winner

So, there is nothing new to report. I was hoping to know something by now, but we don't really know anymore than we did two weeks ago when this all began to unfold. We have provided all the information our agency has asked for and they are going through it with a fine tooth comb. I am so frustrated by this whole thing, but completely understand their needing to verify everything.

I am so ready for this to be over. For two weeks now I have had this ball in the pit of my stomach. I go to bed thinking about it and wake up thinking about it. When the agency's number shows up on our caller ID I feel sick not knowing if it is going to be good, bad, or no news. I haven't been able to focus on anything but the "issue."

I know ultimately there is nothing more we can do. It is completely out of our hands, but I just can't help thinking about Keliah and what might happen to her if we cannot bring her home. Even the kids are asking daily if we have heard anything (the older 3). We tried not to say anything to to them, but they knew instantly that something was up. My heart breaks for Emma, she asks the most, and will be heartbroken if the news is not good.

FOr now we are still trying to be optimistic, but I have to be honest, the longer this drags on, the less optimistic I am.

I will continue to update you as we get information. I feel like I have so much to update on just dealing with the kids, Jaxon especially. I promise, I will update as soon as I can, but right now I just can't bring myself to do much more than get through the day.

In other news, we decided to go ahead and hold the drawing for the iPad 2 giveaway. Originally we were going to wait until this mess was over, but since we have no idea how long that will take, we didn't want there to be any questions as to what was going on with the giveaway.

So, without further ado, the winner of the iPad 2, case, and iTunes gift card is...

Jessica K

I will be contacting you via e-mail immediately. Congrats and thank you to all who participated.